something i just remembered

sometimes i think it's so corny and lame when people do this, but i've had a crazy last few days that have turned out so beautifully. i started building my foundation on the church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints when i was about 20. sure, i had a baby testimony from things like girls camp and efy but it was not til i moved to utah and hit rock bottom that i realized a little more about the Atonement and how the gospel works. it takes a lot of work on our part, but at the same time it's incredibly simple and easy. the way is narrow. the path is clear. my sometimes seemingly sandy foundation of 2 years seems to fail me at times when i stop being completely aware of myself and resort to old patterns or behaviors, nothing major but my immature, irreverent little way of living. the last 6 months have been especially tiresome as i'd left my comfort zone and was given a few trials. i pretty much fell apart ever so slowly, seam by seam, day by day, and for a little season forgot who i am and who i want to be. anyway, to get to the point, my eyes have been open these past few days. i've been reminded of how many blessings i've received and how many are in store for me. i've been reminded of the reality of the Atonement of Jesus Christ, how He can make us new creatures and change our hearts if we only let Him. i learned a great lesson about faith recently as i was listening to an efy song. i heard the lyric as this, "faith the size of a sea can do amazing things, amazing things." i thought to myself, thats true. that much faith can do ridiculously AMAZING things. faith can fix the whole world. then the chorus came around again, and i heard the lyric as it really was: "faith the size of a SEED can do amazing things, amazing things." wow. that much faith, as much as small as the dot on this i, can do amazing things. we as humans are capable of changing and moving forward and putting the past totally behind us. nothing can stop us. if we are living like we should, He will guide our good desires and put us to use as instruments in blessing others lives as well as our own. This gospel is perfect, I want you all to know. And even though we aren't perfect all the time (or ever), that's what we're here for, to learn, and men are that they might have JOY. joy is real. we are alive in Christ. and i'm so thankful for that truth and knowledge. i love this gospel and i love you.